FAIL,

So, I feel like shit. I hate putting up my front, but I guess I have no other choice right now. Everything feels so distant, and I guess everything and everyone just wants to run away. I'm tired of putting up a fight. I want to give in, but just knowing that the spotlight is on me just keeps me going. Sooner or later, they're going to realize right? I mean, I'm breathless trying to constantly explain myself, even through my darkest fight. No matter what, I'm breaking, and falling deeper and deeper in the whole that I've began digging. Life's a drag. I just hate all of this bullshit I have to put up with. If only you had an idea...

I've been so down lately, it's pretty sad. I mean, I'm wasting away, wondering how everyone's doing, beside the fact that I'm not even focusing a bit on myself. I cried myself to sleep last night on how big of a failure I am. Like seriously? I failed my second semester in school, being a best friend, a potential girlfriend, a daughter, a sister? I failed, and you know what? I'm the only one everyone looks to blame.

But whatever, there's a reason for everything. Shit happens, and this times, this will be the last. I'm going to fucking learn from this, cause I swear, I don't think I ever want to put myself through my own damn misery again. I just caused a big fucking mess.